Face Flattened In Motorbike Accident

A woman was left with a flat face after coming off of her motorbike and hitting a wall at 100MPH yesteryear. She is now so ugly, that people at the Zoo pay cash so they DON't have to see her, and she has to be fed with a fishing rod.

The accident happened as she was riding through Doodahland High Street. One minute she was on her bike, the next she was flying through the air. Doctor's are now worried that she is so ugly, that when she throws a boomerang, it will refuse to come back.

The accident also seems to affected the rest of her body, as she now has a pot belly and a fat arse. In fact, some people are saying that she is so ugly, that George Lucas may cast her in the next Star Wars as Jabba The Huts wife - without the need for a costume.

But don't worry love, as apparently fat bottomed girls make the rocking wolrd go round, although I'm not sure about girls that are so ugly, when they walk into the Building Society they turn off the CCTV cameras.